Illinois Hates Me, So I’m Off to See The Wiz, The Wonderful Wiz of Wisconsin.

I woke up this morning to a delight:

wpid-20140516_061529.jpgi had to go out and gather the appropriate amount of WTFs

wpid-20140516_061510.jpgit was a lot. like, more than a bushel basket.

It snowed. Are you kidding me? Snowing, in mid-May. Is this a terrible joke? We just planted the herb bed and had a few little seedlings start up and we planted our garden after a terrible time getting the seedlings to grow which was DUE to the extreme wind/cold/snow/clouds that are relentless. We’ve literally had 3 nice days this year. Three. Otherwise, wind/snow/clouds/rain/cold and that’s it. I almost tore my hair out.

It has since stopped snowing, so I hope my baby plants will survive. Pretty much all I can do. I was going to tarp them, but by the time I found the tarp and some sticks the snow had died down a bit and the coffee to bulls**t ratio had to be evened out. And then I discovered my french press was cracked! Today is going great! Unable to cope, I dumped the grounds in the kettle and have been straining them. It worked, a little watery, but any port in a storm at this point.

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for letting me get that out.

I also wanted to let you know that I will be going on vacation next week to the literal middle of nowhere. No cellphone reception. Thank God. I am not sure how many posts I am going to be able to sneak in between then and now because I am literally working til the day we leave. So, we’ll see. I want to make some bread for the trip and get some ideas of what to cook for dinners other than hot dogs and brats. Because, ugh. All with chips, I’m sure. For the record, I don’t like chips. Home made chips, sure, but store bought tastes like chemicals and tears. To me anyway. I leave next Thursday to go fishing in the Wiz (I fondly refer to Wisconsin as the Wiz. If you’ve ever been there, you’ll understand) and we are taking the in-laws RV and they are taking my terrible stinky pets. I’m sure the pets will suffer with treats being thrown at them constantly and a disgusting amount of cuddles. My brother claims that you’re not truly camping if you use a RV and I reply that I am old and fat and do not care. Also, he hasn’t been camping in years, so whateva.

The trip is usually a boys only trip, sponsored in part by that guy who I suppose I’ll be married to next month‘s place of employment but every since I strolled in, I’ve been invited. I make sure to bring my hair dryer, tons of nail polish and makeup and complain constantly about bugs, fishing and how bored I am.*

*all of that was clearly a lie

IT’S A WHOLE LONG WEEKEND OF FISHING, CATCHING A BUZZ, GOING OUT ON BOATS, COOKING OUT, GETTING MUDDY, NOT SHOWERING, SLEEPING IN, NO CELL PHONES AND PEEING IN THE WOODS*!!!!!

*RV

How is that not awesome? I have a great time every year and finally I learned how to fish, which was something I always wanted to do when I was a kid, but nobody bothered to teach me because I was a girl. Or that’s what I am going with. Sure, I would help when the adults fished, bait their hooks, take off the fish. But no one ever taught me how to do it myself, with my own tackle box and pole. I don’t know, maybe they thought I wasn’t serious.  So now I know how! At least enough to get by and I always manage to catch a buzz. We usually catch and release and eat a few of them. Can’t. Freakin. Wait.

Like I said, hopefully I’ll have a few posts between now and Thursday, but if not, I’ll be back at it when I get home Tuesday! I’m sure I’ll have a million pictures for you guys.

That’s all I really have for today, I’ve got to get more of my wedding dress done while the dude is away so I’m off to the sweatshop!

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12 thoughts on “Illinois Hates Me, So I’m Off to See The Wiz, The Wonderful Wiz of Wisconsin.

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